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Ersatzreal

by Cloudland Blue Quartet

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1.
2.
A HAPPY SONG For the first time ever in my long, long life I’m happy with who I am I can drink in the bar, look in the mirror, Without thinking of the ice cream van And I love how I look in my brand new clothes And I’ll take some of them and a couple of those And now when I look down, down at the ground, I’m so surprised I can see my toes And boy is it great at the garden gate, When you kiss me on the end of my nose And I love how I look in my brand new clothes And I’ll take some of them and a couple of those At last I can be free, and really be just me, And nothing can go wrong And self esteem is a wonderful thing When you feel like you’re the king Of every damn thing When you’ve been down and out In a sea of doubt Crying in your bedroom, never letting it out Now my picture’s on your wall And I’m having a ball And when I pinch myself to wake up That don’t work at all I keep telling myself that this is really real I never thought that I would ever have A reason to feel And I don’t have to hide now you’re by my side, And you love me for who I am And I can go and I can buy anything I want, From the man in the ice cream van And I love how I look in my brand new clothes And I’ll take some of them and a couple of those
3.
THE ANGELS’ KISS Children down on the subway Riding the fast cars Taking their lives in their hands Out there under the streetlamps Down on the corner Holding their heads in their hands And I know you won’t look at me And I know you will never see The heartbreak that I’m feeling now I need to make my way somehow But these eyes never make contact Never see daylight Never just glisten and smile You don’t want to believe that All this could be That’s something that might drive you wild But the angels turn their backs on me Why can’t they see what I can see? They could take me up and out of this And save me with their angels’ kiss
4.
RABBITS ON THE VERGE Rabbits on the verge of the motorway, Minding their own business, eating grass all day I am just like them, I never do look up, And I don’t want to explore, And I eat and eat all day And when the sun goes down at night, I go back home and I sit tight Bathed in the television’s light Rabbits never know, cars go fast not slow, They’re minding their own business, Then one day they go And I am just like them, I never do look up, And I don’t want to explore, And one day I will go
5.
HE THINKS OF YOU And when the music’s over You sit there all alone Nothing has changed and you’re still as lonely You look at the singer Think his song is for you But how could he know The torture and torment You’ve suffered for years And so you leave with just a smile And head for home Behind the door you sit and cry He thinks of you after you’ve gone He’ll never know He thinks of you he wonders why.... Next time he’s there You make sure you’re there too You nurse your coffee and stare into space But you hear his songs And you think they’re about you The torture and torment You’ve suffered for years
6.
THE UNFORTUNATE The little man sits by the phone Awaits a call from an old friend It never comes He’s staying home tonight again. Switch on the TV There’s an old Clark Gable film He’s seen before. He’s not got cable He can’t afford the monthly rent - no He thinks he is the lucky one But he is really the unlucky one Go to the kitchen to the fridge, He gets a beer he checks the date It’s been so long right at the back And now perhaps it’s out of date. Oh yes it is but he don’t care, He’s going to drink it anyway. He pops it open and spills the beer All down his shirt - oh
7.
BLUE EYES ACROSS THE ROOM I drove my car into a wall, The airbag must have saved me And I felt nothing at all, As I stumbled from the wreckage I was high on God knows what that night But I felt nothing was too high And I fell, I fell, For your blue eyes across the room In A&E I floated around for hours, Counting all the flowers delivered to the desk You came for me, you sat with me for hours I wish I’d bought you flowers There was a fireball, the airbag didn’t save me And I felt nothing at all I didn’t make it from the wreckage I was high on God knows what that night Now I know that I was wrong And I fell, I fell, For your blue eyes across the room In A&E you waited around for hours Counting all the flowers delivered to my bed You’d come for me you sat with me for hours You hadn’t bought me flowers
8.
I STILL WRITE YOU LETTERS I still write you letters I just don’t send them anymore And in the dark of my room they lie on the floor And one day I’ll collect them And I’ll unlock my door And I’ll go to the mailbox And I’ll mail them for sure And you’ll learn what I’ve thought For so many years That you hammered me down With the nails of your tears But I don’t want you back, I think I’ve moved on Cos I rent someone’s flat and I own my own gun What’s there left to say, I’ll never get away From all the pain inside I know where you live but I won’t come around Cos I can’t take the pain of hearing the sound Of your voice as you say “You’re looking fine Have you moved on in your life? Cos I’ve moved on in mine” What’s there left to say, I’ll never get away From all the pain inside, Now there’s nowhere I can hide And the world is cold and dark, I’ll ever get that spark, the one that lights my fire Well maybe you were good for me Or maybe it was fantasy But you made me feel like my world was for real And you took me away from the Play for Today And you put them all down Without making a sound Maybe it was fantasy or maybe it was jealousy But you went away despite all I could say And the world seems so dark Without you and your spark That lit up my life for so long So I’ll keep adding letters to that pile on the floor Till I’ve lost all the truth Of what happened before And you’ve changed in my head To something so blurred That I don’t need to write one more useless word
9.
WAITING TO DIE You used to walk in the midday sun You used to know almost everyone But now you’re lost, you’re counting the cost You keep your heart in a coating of frost And tell yourself you’re having fun You wandered aimlessly through your childhood You squandered years in your youth Your twenties, thirties, forties All just passed you by And now you’re waiting, you’re waiting to die So here you come, you’re all dressed in black Those stupid shoes and that so-called trendy hat You thought it was early now you realise it’s late You never thought you’d ever Find yourself in this state And now you’re waiting, you’re waiting to die And now at last, it’s the end of the line For the first time ever in your long long life You’re feeling fine Park your car and walk down to the shore Suddenly you realise you don’t care anymore You’re not waiting, you’re not waiting to die
10.
ANOTHER PIECE OF CAKE You sit and talk and talk and talk about your life You’re so engrossed with what you’ve got, You’ll never know just what I’m like You like your nails and you like your eyes You don’t like your lack of cash And ever since that night out on the tiles You’ve had a rather nasty rash And here comes another piece of cake All covered in cream You’ve forgotten just what the mirror says And you’re living in a dream You’re just so fat it’s quite grotesque And your mouth it never stops You’re either stuffing it full of fatty foods Or talking ‘bout yourself non-stop You never listen to a single word I say I might as well talk to the wall But if you don’t stop you might just drop Without a safety net for your fall I can’t believe despite all this Your face is always smiling Deep down inside you can’t deny The thin you feels they’re drowning
11.
THE LUCKIEST MAN ALIVE And when it all collapsed I was underneath In three weeks’ time a soldier came And pulled me from beneath And I looked so pathetic, My body burned and broken As the cameras were watching me, I heard your words so softly spoken “You are the luckiest man, The luckiest man alive You’re going to live every day from now, Like the last day of your life And you’ll be so glad to have me here, To have me by your side And even though you’re broken in two, You’ll have no reason to hide” Then you said “I won’t go away and I’ll be with you every day I’ll always be right by your side Until the day you die...” You walked into my life Like you had always been around I’d never seen your face before Even in amongst the crowd And as you came towards me slowly I saw that look within your eyes The one that said you wanted me And there could be no compromise I was shocked that this could be I did not represent a prize That did not seem to bother you As you gazed into my eyes And you took my hand and you led me down Into the blackness of your soul It was far too late to turn around When I realised your goal When you said “I have come to take you And you will not get away You are mine and what is yours is mine Today and everyday”
12.
THE GOLDEN HOUSE You think your so cool, oh no, Well no one else in here does To us you’re just a fool, oh yeah, You’ve got a lot to learn now And when you walk into the room, We all roll our eyes then scream The so called saviour of our land You want us all to take your hand Your Golden House is built on sand And its façade’s so see-through Everything you do, you do for you, Don’t think that we don’t understand You think your so cool, oh no, well no one else in here does You love to break the rules, oh yeah, You think you’re so unique now
13.
GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME HERE I can’t describe just how I feel At this precise moment in time So I won’t try, I’ll just say “Thanks for being here” I see you, I know you, I want you always To be with me, stay with me, don’t leave me Don’t leave me please Cos if you go away and leave me here To stay alone without you here If you go away and leave me here How can I go on? When I look back upon our life Together here in our “happy” home I can’t believe it’s come to this, it can’t be true You loved me, I love you, and I always will Why can’t you stay we can work things through There’s nothing left for me to do, I’ve ruined everything we had There’s no way back for you and me You hate me, I can’t blame you, How can I after all the things I’ve done, The things I’ve said, there’s nothing left I know you have to leave
14.
STARTING TO WORRY In a European town, The summer sun is going down, And I’m sitting at a pavement café And I’m thinking of our love, And the times that we have had, And I’m hoping that it never changes You’ve been gone so long now I’m starting to worry, yes I’m starting to worry I can’t quite place this feeling But the passers by, they flicker as they hurry And now I am looking at my watch And I just don’t understand Have I forgotten something, and can you tell me What is that on the back my hand? And then it all comes back to me, Just how I lost my memory I lost you many years ago And now I’m sitting on my bed The machines are everywhere I look now And they’re monitoring my brain, Trying to see if I’m insane The wires are everywhere I look now
15.
THE SECRET OF MY SUCCESS I get ideas from everywhere From little books from who knows where I surf the net and find the lines Before I know it’s turned out fine And no-one knows just how this works They probably think that this must hurt And they believe it’s what I feel But I know it’s not really real All this heartache all this pain And now here comes that song again They sound the same maybe it’s true These songs are all about me and you I take the words from here and there, Just things I’ve seen that catch my eye I hardly have a new idea, There must be much that passes me by And late at night when I’m in bed, The words are spinning round my head And suddenly they all make sense, I see at last just what I meant Or am I reading too much in, Am I committing the cardinal sin Of writers all around the world, Believing art attracts the girls And now here comes another song The words just flow they can’t be wrong Cos they’re from deep inside my head And this is all that I have said Another day another song Another word that rhymes with song I can’t dissect or I’ll find out Just what this song is all about
16.
THE ANGELS TOOK HIS SOUL Well she stayed with him till daybreak, When the birds began to sing Then came the sound of voices, Of tables and chairs moving And the voices carried up to her And a knock came at the door And she hoped it was the doctor She could not take it anymore She’d sat with him sipping champagne, His body on the bed Thinking of all the little things, That would now remain unsaid And he looked a lot more healthy, In death than he had in life And she knew more than anyone, Thirty years she’d been his wife And she thought of all they’d done, Throughout those thirty years All the things they’d never talked about And all her unseen tears Now she wept this time before him, As he lay upon the bed She felt her life was wasted, And he just lay there dead One life is all you get, one life is what you take One life is what you make, One life is almost gone, One life is all you get, One life, it’s not over yet And the angels took his soul, And put a smile upon her face
17.
Lights Out 04:20
LIGHTS OUT As I walk out in the night The stars shine up above Then blink out one by one And it’s suddenly so quiet And I can’t see where I am And once they were so bright They lit up my whole life Now they blink out one by one And I’m feeling so alone And I can’t see where I am And then I’m out overlooking the whole town Looks so small as I look down And the streetlights give me hope That I haven’t lost it all And somehow I’ll find your love On the street that we call home The fire burns brightly in our hearth Our love burns brightly in our hearts We keep the darkness from our door And we’ll always be in love And I’ll never leave your side And you never will leave mine
18.
They took my car away today They took my home to make me pay For all the things I’ve had I shouldn’t have I had a promising career, In a little town 10 miles away I never thought that I would stay so long And if I’d known what I know now, That everything is up for grabs And nothing is beyond our grasp at all And we can reach right out and touch the stars, Clean up the mess and heal the scars And feel again Is this the end of everything? I ended up behind this bar, Without my house without my car I never thought that you would leave me too And now there’s little left to say, They’re taking me away today I never thought that I could stay so long
19.
NO CONCRETE IDEA I have no concrete idea Of what my life is all about I drift along without a care Why am I here, what’s it all for, What is the purpose of my life I drift along without a care I see the trees, I see the sky, I love the sea, I wonder why Why is it that we are all here It cannot be that this is chance There must surely be a truth Behind the wonders that we see If there’s a God somewhere above, Why does he not proclaim his love Are we alone spinning in space, The lonely know this is the place The place we’re born and where we’ll die Why am I here, what’s it all for, What is the purpose of my life Can there just be no reason why Day by day I make my way Towards the ashes in the vase I drift along without a care Can it be true there’s nothing more, Why then do we exist at all To struggle here upon the earth Knowing we’ll never leave this berth To live and die under the sun No holy father no holy one There is no God up there above We only live to give our love
20.
ERSATZREAL PT 2 We sit together in a darkened room, We are our own cabal We walk in black and our whips do crack, Along the bright canal We sing our songs by leafy ponds, We are the black chorale We put our writings on your glass By way of our decal We are the ones beyond your dreams, We seek the femme fatale We drive the world from deep below A simple white locale We read old books, we paint and cook, We are Les Fleurs du Mal We drink from coloured, painted bottles, We drink the black Mescal We work as best we ever can To bring down your morale We use all that we can to live, We even use Pascal We put your loved one on the cross On the original Paschal We adorn our clothes, adorn our hats With the feathers of Quetzal We will prevail you know we will, We are Ersatzreal We are the ones beyond your dreams, We are Ersatzreal

about

Erstazreal is the 6th song-based album from Cloudland Blue Quartet (Crispycat 0705 - 8 October 2007)

credits

released October 8, 2007

Cloudland Blue Quartet
Ersatzreal
Composition, Performance, Production & Design by David Reilly

Written and recorded at Crispycat Studio, Edinburgh, July 1 2005 – July 19 2007

1, 3, 6, 9, 12, 17, 20 © David Reilly 2007
2, 4, 5, 7, 8, 10, 11, 13, 14, 15, 16, 19 © David Reilly 2006
18 © David Reilly 2005

This Recording (P) 2007 Crispycat Recordings

Project Dates:
July 1 2005
March 5, 6 2006
April 16, 23, 30 2006
May 28 2006
July 9 2006
August 6, 26 2006
September 18 2006
January 16, 17, 20, 24, 28, 31 2007
February 1, 3, 9, 11, 12, 14, 17, 18, 21, 23, 24, 25 2007
March 24, 25, 30, 31 2007
April 1, 2, 3, 7, 8, 9, 11, 14, 15, 16, 21, 22 2007
June 3, 16, 17, 20 2007
July 19 2007

Artwork:
Fires at Impossible Songs, 15 April and 15 June 2007

Produced by David Reilly
Executive Producer - Anne Reilly

Special Thanks to
Jamie Frain, Andy Wilson, Craig Sutherland, Stuart Cobley, Alan Brodie, John Barclay, Ali Hutton

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Cloudland Blue Quartet Edinburgh, UK

A quartet in name only, initially influenced by Fripp & Eno's "No Pussyfooting" and The Velvet Underground's debut, songwriter & soundscaper David Reilly started musicking in 1977 by creating drones using sellotape on the keys of his dad's Bontempi Organ. The subsequent junk shop purchases of an electric guitar & fuzzbox and the acquisition of an old Beatles songbook, led him into songwriting... ... more

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